Confessions of a Sentimentalist

jotting the history; living the moment; dreaming the future

Peacefully at ease

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I remember there’s this tutorial from the professional development module I had over a year ago, the lecturer wanted us to think about the 3 most important values/things in your life and depict it into 3 simple icons. I drew a peace sign, smiley face and a house I think. And these 3, my lecturer explained, will be the 3 things that can guide us in making decisions and affect how we cope and deal with problems and challenges in the future.

My peace sign; to have peace within you. To feel peaceful and contented and grateful.

A smiley face; positivity all the way! What makes me happy? What can make others happy?

House; to forging and maintain quality relationships with people who are important in your life. What can be done to achieve this?

I think about these 3 a lot more than I expect I would. To my surprise, they just stuck around in my head. How am I feeling today? What can I do to make myself feel better? How do I make this nice feeling that I’m feeling last? What do I want from this situation?

It was a sense of peaceful contentment that kind of overwhelmed me on my way to ahma’s house from work. That amazing fuzzy feeling that makes you think all is well?

I owe it all to these wonderful things that happen this week.

1. Happy reunion with my lovely musketeers!

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2. Hilarious moment when Mawar’s fork broke!

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3. Sketching Mawar’s side view in class! Sorry to tarnish your image, Mawar… But it sure was fun being an ‘artist’!

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4. On Thursday BONGER and I went to the bake store to get baking supplies. I’m gonna make some lemon cheesecake with that soon-to-expire mascarpone cheese, while she’s gonna surprise her other half with some birthday cheesecake. I wonder how it went! She’s like super nervous about it all on Friday.

5. TGIF! We went back to good ‘ol GHPS to work some extra hours on the last weekday. What I didn’t expect was to arrive with 7 packed lunches, 2 soya milk and 2 bottles of coke and a group of hungry teachers awaiting our arrival. It felt great to see that nothing has changed since we left for school (but again, how much can change in just one week?). Walking down Cecil, settling back down in that familiar small but cozy ikea desk outside the principal’s room… It just felt as though we had never left. Lady boss walked right in when we were back working on our computers talking to the principal, acting like it was any other work days. Until fiza exclaimed EH? MRS QUEK! Then she realized our return! Hahaha! Daphne even exclaimed that ‘there’s finally life back here in the office again’.

Oh yeah, my little cutiepie recovered and came back on Friday too! That was seriously one of the nicest surprise I’ve had in a while. Played a little with her before I went back to work, but it was enough to keep me smiling for hours HEHEHE! Saddening news was the quick outbreak and spreading of HFMD among the children. The PGs population reduced to 1, and ‘mini me’ was affected too. BOO:(

One of the nicest thing that I heard that day was, “feel free to come to me for any help you need, I will be here.” seriously, how blessed can I be with such a supporting and kind principal, you tell me!

6. Saturday was pre-cramps day for me, if not I would have went jogging at least one round at the yishun reservoir with Jasmine. But I plan to bike there from woodlands next Saturday though! Hopefully the weather will cooperate ya!

7. Impromptu pizza dinner @ Jasmine’s! I’m on my way there now! YAY!

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Written by GekTeng

April 22, 2012 at 5:52 PM

Crawling moments, tiring days.

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3 days in to school, and boy, it sure is tiring. It’s back to those ‘good’ old days where I am rarely NOT tired or sleepy, EVEN after naps. I don’t know why this happens, right after the first day of school still!

And sometimes I forgot I’m already a Year 3. Hahaha, even though it’s been tough the past 2 semesters, I still have this ‘Year 2’ feeling in me. Denying the fact that things are gonna get tougher and tougher as I progress? I GUESS SO.

Lessons are coming along well, I’m still catching up, thank god. We’re taking modules regarding MANAGING a childcare centre as a principal (not like I ever see myself being one) but yeah, lots of admin details, getting to know the laws and ministries involved, global issues, finance and budgeting YADA YADA. However challenging and overwhelming the module ‘teachers as researchers’ is, I am actually glad to have such good lecturers like Sukuna and Lavina to guide us through. Hopefully I will be able to do the final project in GHPS and which they changed from group to individual component. I’d love to get back there and work with the teachers and children! Really pumped! Haha!

And it’s good seeing my lovely musketeers too! I know we don’t really initiate meetups and gatherings once we’re out of school BUT when we get back together when school reopens, we’re still the same old us hahaha! Same lame jokes and funny epic moments.

Mawar got her scholarship money and as promised, treated us to lunch! We went to J3 which is a new shopping centre at jurong east. It’s funny how I still get the chills just seeing the place alone and recall how I felt during the various piano exams that are held in that place. I think I’ll never be able to get over it. Oh, main point being, the chef cooked some awesome vegetarian dish for me, saying that the dish that I originally ordered contained chicken powder. Thank god for good service hahaha! The roasted broccoli and carrots reminded me of that complimentary dish we had that fateful night we walked into the Italian restaurant in back in Perth!

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Today was Sheena’s first day of work without Hafiza and me, and we sent her this drama mama photo of us for her to prop in front of her work desk so that it will appear that we’re still seated and working opposite her. Hahaha!

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Okay, that’s all for tonight! Tomorrow Hafiza and I will be taking a trip to the bakery store and maybe get some butter for mother too. Friday is the day I go back to GHPS! Cant wait!

Written by GekTeng

April 18, 2012 at 10:44 PM

Something and something else.

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You may be disappointed if you fail, but you are doomed if you don’t try.

– Beverly Sills.

Super disappointed. Yes, I failed my driving test yesterday. To be more exact, I FLUNKED it. Did a stupid mistake that cost that whole license. Seriously what happened to my memory hahaha. Was supposed to turn out when the kerb was in line with my shoulder during vertical parking and I started to turn when it was in line with the door handle instead. I even gasped when the car slanted upwards on the kerb. Hais. Now I have to try again. Mom says I can learn more and all, but I think I still need some time to get over that stupid mistake of mine. Ugh. I wonder if my previous instructor will curse and scold when he sees me coming in for practical sessions AGAIN. I hate to disappoint, disappoint myself, and others. But I guess that’s just an unpractical and unrealistic side of me that I must let go a little of.

More sad news. BONGER just told me this noon that my little cutiepie’s really gotten HFMD.  Poor thing. Just days shy of her first birthday and all this shit has to happen? Seriously!

Today’s been a stay-at-home-and-chill-and-try-not-to-think-about-yesterday-day. Watched HBO for the past few hours and seriously it was the highlight of my day. Now I find myself starting to find more awesome old movies to watch. I love the 1982 movie ‘Annie’! Think it was adapted from a really successful broadway musical and all. Love how talented and wonderful the children were, singing and acting. They just put a smile on your face. The other movie was screened in 2004;  ‘Before sunset’ starring Ethan Hawke and Julie Delpy. I remembered watching this and the 1995 prequel, ‘Before Sunrise’ on one of the local channels a few years back. They shot the second one 9 years later, which is exactly the same amount of years the protagonists spent apart from each other before they fatefully meet again. ‘Before sunrise’ was shot in Venice while the other was shot in Italy. Beautiful places and scenery throughout the whole film. I like! It’s a really simple concept but filled with deep meanings and quotes. It’s just 2 people walking and talking about life and love and more things. Surprisingly, I liked how simple everything came through! Though it definitely feels a little different compared to the first time I watched it.

Okay, that’s all I want to say for today. School’s starting soon, no matter how I dislike the thought of it happening. A song written and sung by Julie Delpy for the movie (I suppose…) and 2 of my favourite songs from the movie ‘Annie’ to end the post off.

 

I love how soulfully she sings!

 

The sun’ll come out tomorrow

So you got to hang on til tomorrow, come what may!

Tomorrow, tomorrow, I love you, tomorrow

You’re always a day away

 

Remember you’re never fully dressed

Though you may wear the best

You’re never fully dressed without a smile!

Written by GekTeng

April 14, 2012 at 11:43 PM

Of yesterday and today and (maybe) tomorrow.

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Yesterday was my unofficial last day at GHPS. I’ll still be coming back during school holidays and also some free fridays during the academic year though. My little cutiepie got suspected of HFMD too.. Poor thing. I think she kinda knew something was wrong when she had to stay in her crib in infant care, then after that to be wheeled in to the office. I wasn’t there when she got to the office though, busy in classrooms or whatever, I forgot. When I got back I saw she wasn’t her usual happy and fiesty self. She sat in the corner of her crib and was sniffing badly. Heartbreak. I never thought I will ever have a chance to see her being so upset. Never want to again. Not any child. Ever. But well, she was so well-liked by the teachers and all that some including me came and hushed her a little. HEr parents were super efficient. She hasn’t even had her lunch before her father arrived in school to pick her up. I remembered giant baby went home in the late afternoon after spending the whole afternoon with us in the office. Speaking about giant baby, I haven’t seen him for 2 weeks already! He’ll be coming back to school the day I start school. I miss him hahaa!

Of today. Actually the previous paragraph is just to calm me down. I’m gonna have my driving test in approximately 3 hours time and I’m scared stiff. I don’t think I will do that well, But I DON’T WANNA FAIL! It’s such a scary feeling arrrrgh! I don’t even know how to explain. What if I forget to check something? or turn the mirrors back to place after I finish parking? I don’t even wanna start worrying. Earlier on I was sitting on a chair in the woodlands library visualising the circuit routines. Everyone who walked pass (luckily there was only a few) was looking at me quizzically. I wonder how I looked then. Like I’m daydreaming? NO I’M DOING SERIOUS STUFF. SERIOUS STUFF GOING THROUGH MY HEAD NOW YAW! So now’s my relax and breathe in breathe out HOO HOO HAA HAA time. Later I will want to visualise again. And road conditions, PLEEEEASE BE GOOD! Don’t have so many cars roaming around and all PLEASE. and stupid cars/vans/trucks/lorries stop loitering near road junctions and all! don’t even appear and block my lane. I remember the last time I was so scared was during my piano exams I think. uGH i DON’T EVEN WANNA THINK ABOUT IT. I just know I don’t wanna come back to that SSDC anymore for more driving lessons and burn a hole in my/my father’s pocket. PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PASS. DON’T STRIKE OR MOUNT AND STUPID KERBS PLEASE. nonono.

Okay. Of tomorrow. What happens today will affect tomorrow. In less than 4 hours time (I think…) I will know if I’m able to drive or not. Then if I reeealy could (that means I PASS), I can finally get to drive 2 cars. my dad’s, or my aunt’s. So pleaseeeeeee. MAINTAIN. IMPROVE. REMEMBER!

and most importantly, BREATHE IN BREATHE OUT HOO HOO HAA HAA.

Written by GekTeng

April 13, 2012 at 12:57 PM

Posted in Uncategorized

Remember today.

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I can’t begin to say how much I wanted to remember today for the rest of my life. I need to. Because today is the day I step into a brand new stage in the world of early childhood educators.

Okay, people. Today, I had a child MERLION on me.

Puke.

Vomit.

Merlion.

SAME!

WOW.

Although the first thing I had to say was ‘oh shit’, BUT the thought that subconsciously popped to my head was ‘Welcome to the world world of teachers’ ECH teachers, to be more exact. Haha.

The smell on puke has been and still lingering within my surroundings for a while now, but I think it’s just me. But well, what learning experience is called a learning experience without a little drama and funky gross incidents? LOLS! Welcome to reality, self. Taking care of young children doesn’t mean it’s always gonna be full of sunshine and rainbows and unicorns and nyan cats (although most of the time it is 🙂 ). WHAT NYAN CATS??! Okay, maybe barney and sesame street and blues clues. But you get my point.

So I endured the smell and all those yucky stuff that should not be legal to be posted and cleaned up for her. Bathed her while she’s still crying away (hais.), washed her stained clothes AND BOLSTER… I remembered it took forever.

Only then I took care of myself. PHEW.

Well, on a good note, it’s a new and somehow great feeling to put others’ needs before yours; something that I don’t really do often. Or get to do often. Honestly, looking back, I’m pretty amazed that I could actually keep it cool and present a straight face (well not entirely) throughout the whole she-bang. And this, I reminded myself, is something I need to get used to if I were to stay in this field. A disclaimer: I don’t exactly get reminded of this incident with vengence and all, it’s just the gross part of it happening and the cleaning up part that grosses me out, that’s all. A little washing and cleaning and crazy spamming of febreeze and dettol can clear the vomit stains and smell away, no sweat. And to think that I actually survived, I’M REALLY AMAZED! I think I’m off to a great start in this field. hahaha!

I can’t start to tell you how blessed I feel with an awesome group of colleagues and teachers and bosses. Lady boss called up her sister who usually comes around in the late morning to get a clean shirt for me but she was already out by then so she called her husband, who was also one of the founding directors of the preschool to come by with a clean shirt for me so that I can wash and dry my puke-stained shirt ASAP. I thank them with my whole heart and soul. Thinking back, we were also still joking with the staff about how my shirt was limited edition and all.

So, I must remember today. The grossness, the smell and most importantly how and why this incident is a crucial stepping stone for me towards the road of becoming a full-fledged teacher, and it’s also to remind myself that hey, I’ve actually handled this situation pretty well! (in my books, yes, I think for a first-timer puking target like me, I did.)

And you know what, I realised how important it is to be smiling and keeping the positivity around amidst of all the chaos and pow-wow. I remembered telling myself to deal with the mess and be done with it ASAP, and don’t let it affect my mood or the way I shall treat/behave/see children in the future. Seriously, it helps! These reminders help me get over the things and also make the cleaning up process more joyful and happy and memorable. It sounds really wierd right? I KNOW! But yeah, among all the eeky yucky vomit stains and smell, what I remembered more clearly was how aunty and I joked about how this shirt and the ‘design’ is the only kind in the world, and how silly teacher gekteng looked when she did a short ‘fashion show’ in front of the kids waiting in the toilet during shower time. (one child even said she liked my shirt! HAHAHAHAHHAHAA!)

So choose happiness! Even if things don’t go as well as planned, you can still make it a better experience and memory with a positive attitude and a SMILE!

So, remember today, REMEMBER TODAAAAY.

 

“you’re funny.”

“who? who’s funny?”

“you, teacher, you’re funny.”

And sometimes, small and simple moments like these matter the most, and they can fill your heart like a pot full of honey for Winner the Pooh.

 

 

WHAT!!?!

Written by GekTeng

April 5, 2012 at 10:31 PM

happy happenings

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“You can’t always be happy. But if you are always striving to choose happiness – everyday you wake up and say to yourself, “I’m going to choose to not let the outside influences in the world affect my mood…” – I promise you will live a happier life.”

-Shay Carl

Yay, this week has been great. Happy days all round, and lots of activities and tired mornings as a result. hehehee!

Started the week off a little sick, but I’m so glad to meet my super ladies Shuhui, Jerica, Isabel and Xinying for lunch AND dinner all in one day. In the past it’s always Shuhui and me who are ALWAYS available for meetups during the holidays, and now they are making way to Raffles Place to have lunch with me. Felt kind of sad that I couldn’t join them for their shopping trip at Far East after that and eat chee cheong fan, but we met up again at Orchard to get dinner. Hahaha, it would have been a PERFECT pre-overnight meet up, Jerica was so silly and sheepish about the whole alight-at-AMK-to-go-toilet thing it was like a live comedy happening right in front of our eyes. Then we spent almost 20 minutes waiting for her while I shared the funny happenings that happened in school these days. Everyone was cracking up after Jerica was back. Serious-and-mature Shuhui mama couldn’t even stop laughing after we continued our journey home on the train. HILARIOUS. hahaha!

We’re planning for bel’s birthday which will be celebrated sometime next week. Hopefully we can get the bag she wants, which I have no idea how it looked like. Hmms. We’ll see.

Oh and the driving. My god. Blame it on the procrastinator in me, I didn’t get the practical slots I wanted! Ended up booking the night PEAK periods which costs around $8 more. SHUCKS. Hopefully I’ll be able to pass my driving test.

Moving on! I wore the same shade of jeans as my cute little one @ Genius Hive! Cute max!

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I also had quite alot of fun with the infants as well! I’m always enjoying my time there hahaha. Each and every session I helped out, I get to know and interact more with them, vice versa. Will miss my babies soooo much when I leave for school!

Yesterday I went to watch Bibap at esplanade too! Aunt had an extra ticket and invited me along with my cousins. Better than I expected! Love the beat-boxing and the musical dynamics, character presentations and dramatic effects. They even invited the audiences to participate in the show and all that. AWESOME SHOW! Made me so relaxed and all. No pictures though ahahhaa! I forgot to get my camera out and the esplanade people are super strict about filming within the theatre so… better not la hahaaa! But it’s good! I missed Breakout and JUMP! when they were here in Singapore, but I swear I won’t miss them when they come again!

And wow, the thought and revisiting of esplanade made me relive my the Acapella Championships memories all over again. I was just 14 then, but I can forever remember the feeling of clinching the champion for the competition. Sec 2 was a good year. Awesome year in my world of singing choirs and acapella. Those were the days AHHHHHHHH.

I FINALLY went for a haircut just now! Recently I keep having hair falling all over the place everywhere I go. Ask Hafiza my bonger, she’ll know. hahahaa! Should be because of the weight of my long hair that resulted in that. Hopefully there won’t be anymore drastic hairfalls in the office PLEASE! OH YEAH, I GOT BANGS TOO! SIDE BANGS! hahaa! yayme ! lols!

April Fools Day tomorrow! Don’t think anyone’s gonna play pranks though. hahaha We’ll see….

Written by GekTeng

March 31, 2012 at 9:47 PM

Posted in A Wordy Life, My Thoughts

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my mood is swinging is swinging

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I feel compelled to blog today, especially after such a sad crappy post from yesterday.

So today has been a rather nice day, except I’m a little ill AGAIN.

Damn, being ill SUCKS. Okay let’s not be negative today.

So we went to the temple to visit my deceased grandpa like we do every year. It’s like a small family gathering where my paternal relatives gather and catch up. I didn’t really take part in the conversations, but I really enjoyed listening to their stories from work and all that. I guess some (or most!) of my dramatic genes comes from my father and his sisters. Hehehehe it’s just so interesting and funny to watch and listen to them talk.

I found out Pinterest finally did some changes to their terms, so I went back to repinning and boy, oh boy I looooove that site. Found so much teaching tips and ideas I almost wept. I found a new author that I really love too! Marianne Richmond is her name, and I adore her illustrations. Love the topics that she touches on in her children’s books – of love, self-respect and all those things that make my heart flutter as I imagine myself sharing them to children. My future children, and those that I’m going to teach. I’m so inspired all of a sudden, you know? There’s so many possibilities and I’m actually excited to graduate and be a full-fledged teacher. 

Gosh I miss the kiddos in Genius Hive. Especially the infants, since I spent some time there helping out. I didn’t really help out in the child care section, but I really look forward to knowing each and every child there! I can’t wait to finish my main workload and help out in the classrooms. See, I’m getting more and more attached to this place.Is this what I want? I don’t know, since it’s only a temporary job. Is this something that make me happy? HELL YEAH. All the time.

I wonder if it’s a good thing to get so easily attached to something/ some place/ someone?

HMMS, only time will tell I guess.Let’s revisit this topic again soon.

Alrighto burrito, so these are some things that are going through my mind now. I need to sleep already, the flu meds are kicking in quickly and I’m losing consciousness as I type. Hahaha!

Great blogging session, GekTeng! Yay! I shall blog more often. Yes. I really should. But what if the things I blog are more or less the same? Ok whatever. I shall blog whatever.

good ni..zzzzzzzzzzzzzZZZZZZZZZZZZzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

Written by GekTeng

March 25, 2012 at 9:01 PM

Posted in Uncategorized

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