Confessions of a Sentimentalist

jotting the history; living the moment; dreaming the future

>this is such a happy lesson day~~~

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>kids. always that hyper and cute and innocent. i wish i could be like them the whole time, and do not have any huge and major responsibilities to worry about. sighs, life gets more complicated when you’re older. as i’m thinking about how nice it would be to be a kid once again, at the same time i can’t wait to grow up and build my own future. so there’s the irony. you can’t really get enough of what life is offering, and often get greedy. in the end, you don’t really know what you really want.

i wish i could be a kid. in that way i don’t have to think about the complicated things in life. in that way i’ll just live in my own happy world made up of nothing but treats. i’ll not know about how global warming is affecting our earth, and how the fragile lives of human beings are destroyed when disasters of all kinds strikes. i’ll never come to know about how humans can be scheming and scrulpulous when it comes to fame and money. and this is always the time where pure and genuine friendships are formed. it is when 2 little persons just converse, and seconds later they’ll become best friends. all because of the fact that you don’t have to be anyone but yourself.

i wish i could stay in this phase of my life too, as a teenager. in that way i won’t have to think about how my future will turn out to be. in that way i can also get freedom. in that way i’ll be able to stay in the moment and not part with all those beautifully imperfect friends that i’ve made. in that way i’ll be able to do silly things with them, and not worry about how other people look at us. in that way we can walk in the rain singing loudly and not care about a damn thing.

i wish i could grow up fast. in that way i’ll be rid of my duties and responsibilities from my studies, and be able to earn money to support my family, and obtain the standard of living i’ve always dreamt to have. in that way, i’ll be able to live up to my dreams and make a difference to the world, however small my contribution may be. in that way, i could afford to go travelling around the world, like i always dream of doing. in that way, i can meet lots of different people and view life with different perspectives.

sometimes, i wish i could just sleep, and wake up, and eat, and do things that i like, without any responsibilities, without restrictions, without reservations. i could be as crazy, or as melancholic whenever i like, without having to think about how others may see me.

however perfect my wishes are, well, one has to face up to reality. the harsh and cruel reality. life must go on. and i’ve come to understand; do not be sorry for the things you’ve done in the past, live your life to the fullest everyday, cherish them, and hold them tight with both hands, and always be hopeful of the future, and wherever it might take you.

i’ll learn to be contented and cherish the times i have now in my last few months of my ever so wonderful secondary school life. it’ll be hard to let them go; but life has to go on, and one have to move on. but wherever one may go, the ties that are bonded will never break. but will strengthen as time pass. with you guys as friends, i’m beginning to believe in this. i can see in like,30years later in our lives, when we come together and laugh about the past. and our oh-so-wonderfully imperfect teenage lives.

and once again, i’ve posted such a philosophical and somewhat melancholic post. i don’t know how, but feelings just came pouring into me. so yeah.

cl olevel is on monday. and i believe as long as i do my best, put in hard work, i’ll eventually get what i want. this applies to the rest of my subjects too.

i’ve decided not to post pictures today. doesn’t really suit the mood of this post.

”when life offers you a dream so far beyond any of your expectations, it’s not reasonable to grieve when it comes to an end.”

however hard it may seem, i’ll try to live up to this quote. i promise.

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Written by GekTeng

May 30, 2009 at 11:07 PM

Posted in Uncategorized

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